Saturday, April 18, 2009

The Story of Creation

Ever since, I am always intrigued with this Story of Creation. It is the first story that I ever read, which is of course the first story in the Bible. The Story of Creation marks the dawn of mankind and the birth of all sins. I have been asking myself for a long time, what if Eve did not give in to the serpent's temptation? Would you be alive? Would mankind burst into this vast diversity? Would there be a world as we know today? I sometimes wonder, though I did not really presume that what I'm thinking is a sin or what, but I sometimes doubt if God really "intends" for man to sin. Haha. Really stupid of me, what do you think? Though I'm not really convinced on what I stupidly "assume", its just a dumb thought I think. :D

While browsing some articles in Reader's Digest, March 2009, I stumbled into this article about the Creation. Its a sort of a parody and I was laughing all the way, here's what is says:

.... In the beginning God created heaven and earth. And earth was without form and void.

And God made a circular light in the heavens, and he called it the Sun. And God saw that the light was good.

And the Devil made a smaller light, rectangular in shape, and he called it TV. And the Devil saw that the light was bad.

And God made springs which came out of the ground, oozing fountains of pure, fresh water. And God saw that the water was good.

And the Devil invented fizzy drinks. And saw that the fizzy drinks were bad.

And God said, Let the earth bring forth vegetables, and the herb of the field, that the children may grow up healthy. And it was so.

And the Devil said, Let there be deep-fried potatoes.

And God said, Let the water bring forth 10,000 varieties of fish, that they may provide sustenance for the children.

And the Devil arranged that the fish be smothered in batter, deep fried, and served with deep-fried potatoes.

And God created the cattle of the field, and said, Behold, I have given you every living creature that moveth; to you it shall be for meat.

And the Devil showed how the meat could be minced and turned into burgers, and suggesteth that it be always served with deep-fried potatoes.

And on the seventh day, God rested and asked that his children rest too, and use the day to contemplate the wonders of creation.

And the Devil created the all-day brunch, cartoon TV channels, and Sunday newspapers filled with articles about celebrities, that the minds of the children be filled with rubbish and their bodes filled with yet more deep-fried potatoes.

And God said to the boy, Take the girl and go forth and multiply. And of your seed I shall make a great nation, as numberless as the stars of heavens.

And the Devil invented the computer and recruited 10,000 demons to fill it with online battles and images of top-heavy women. And the boy did part with the girl and did instead cleave to the computer.

And God pointed out to the girl that he had made her with many attractive blandishments which she could use whenever the boy was away from the computer.

And the Devil invented the Nintendo DS Lite so that the boy will be able to take computer games with him wherever he goes.

Now the serpent was more subtle than any of the animals that God had created. And the Devil dud enter into the serpent and cause him to say to the girl and the boy, The tree in the middle of the garden the Lord hath told you not to touch. But I say unto you, if you eat of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, your eyes will be opened and you shall be gods.

And the boy and the girl looked at the serpent and said unto him: No thanks. We liketh not fruit. But hast thou any deep-fried potatoes?

And here endeth today's scripture reading. Amen.
And oh, if ever the first man and woman have not committed sin, would you and I stand face to face naked? Just a thought. :D


3 comments:

tubby said...

Haha. That was an interesting read. No, I don't think a million generations of humans will pass successfully without one of them surrendering to the temptation of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil.

If the very first, unstained humans weren't able to go against the temptation, we wouldn't be.

Kim said...

Tawa ako ng tawa nung nabasa ko 'yan
ala lang, guilty. :D

Oh well, you have a point there. Maybe if ever the first human were not able to give in, maybe the next ones will do.
There will be no you and me.

:D

tubby said...

Well, God anticipated all that anyway, hehe.

They might have been one of the best personalities possible in a human, Adam and Eve, and yet they gave in.