I miss my Congo!

Currently Thinking:Why Did God took Congo too early?
I just received a shocking news this afternoon, my little doogy--congo just died. Very tragic, gives me a teary eyes. Mom says that the day before, Congo was not feeling better, vomitting, didn't her food. Then today, the most mournful thing happened---she died. I really miss her. Just remembering how that dog will wait for me until I finish meal and give her some food and the most thing that I will miss on her was her "stretching" talent. Whenever we say "Congo, stretch". She will stretch her two front feet and wiggle her bunny-like tail. Uh...I really miss that dog. But that's life. You live and you die. As simple as that. Time really comes when we really have to flee from this earth, say goodbye to all the things that we worked hard for, say goodbye to our dreams and to the people we love. That's life. It all ends to---death. As simple as that. Death ends it all.

I am trying to have an inner make-over from this day on. I bought this book "A girl's Guide to Inner Beauty" at Robinson's yesterday before the play because I am too early for our meeting time. Along with the Precious Moments Bible that I excitingly bought, and because of too much exaggeration, I thought that that Bible cost 700 bucks but to my surprise, it only cost 250 as far as I can recall. So I was able to buy this "Inner Beauty" Make-over will is exactly cost 120 pesos. I think it is the time for me to cleanse my inner self. Like what other people say:Inner beauty radiates through outside. So I think for me to be beautiful...haha...I'm talking nonsense....I think I should begin from inside to outside. With Bibles and Self-help books on my hands, I hope that I can live up on what I say. But also I won't forget to pray. Praying is my only means of communication to God and to Jesus. It's like a telephone line. Although, I didn't hear God's voice, everytime I pray and if I do that would but creeps on me...hehe...I know that He is there--listening, comforting, wiping up my tears, tapping my back and saying "Hey! I am here! Just talk to me and I will listen to everything that makes your heart weary." If it feels good when you have a person you can talk with, it feels way better if God is the one who is listening to you and has open mind to understand the way you think and feel, unlike other people who really don't understand you. God is so good, powerful, loving, caring, affectionate. He is Everything. He gives me strength when sometimes I can't go on anymore, when everything seems so wrong, when I feel so weak inside and out, when I didn't know what to do anymore. Just call him and he will be there. He is always there.

Waffling Thoughts

Currently Reading: Lark by Ginny Aiken
Last night at around 12:30 in the midnight I finished reading "The Last Sin Eater" by Francine Rivers. It's a very good novel, so good that you don't want to let go of the book even though my eyes really wanna close--i'm so sleepy. But I think, hey kim! there's only one more chapter to go and the emotion that I have felt through the novel will be gone the next morning so i decided to finished reading it.


The Last Sin Eater is a compelling and somewhat a kind of mysterious novel, I bought this novel at the "Dulos" you know, the boat at South Harbor where they travel around the world to have a booksale price of books. It's kinda cool. I bought this book way back third year but it is only until now that I finished reading it. haha.. Along with "The Last Sin Eater", I bought "Lark". Actually, the reason I really hastened my reading of The Sin Eater was because I really want to start reading "Lark", I read at the back cover that it is a good romance from the reviews. So right now, I am just at the beginning of the story and it seems quite good. After this Lark book, I will finish reading "The Time Traveller's Wife". You know, it's quite funny because I really don't want this novel, I find it boring and simply erratic on the way the story flows. Anyways, I am not fond of leaving a book unfinished. It's like leaving a life cruelly without putting an end to it. So even though I don't want reading it, i will force myself to.

This may sound stupid and hilarious, but I miss school. Really. Honestly. Not that I want to know my grades in the last periodic test because my grade really suck in Physics!-o God the glory of Physics! and Math- *Cross-fingers* I hope mam will still have considerations!. It's not like that. It's just so boring here at home, nothing to do but to stare in front of the computer, writing this blog that is full of nonsense because I cannot think anymore of a topic to write because nothing happens in my life, watching boring tv shows but thank God there is Grey's anatomy to feed my satisfaction, sleeping? That's a good thing though, I am pleading for more sleeps so there it goes, God has give plenty of time to sleep and I am at least very thankful for it. Reading good books? That another good thing though, finishing to read The Last Sin Eater, makes my faith really stronger and now reading "The Lark"--I hope to be in love. haha

It's a grand vacation you know? From Wednesday up until monday, we will have no classes. Yipee! But I just said I want to go to school, but still a Yipee! because there is no classes. Uhmm....

A Fresh New Start

Currently Listening to: Jenny- The Click 5
I have just changed my skin, again. For the I don't know time, I changed my blog again and don't you just love the ambience of my skin? It's so cool, refreshing, peaceful, elegant and that's what I am to do. To start cool and refreshing, forgetting the past and what bad and undesirable things that happened in the past. Classes was cut today due to a typhoon, named Egay. I know that classes will be cut because the rain never stopped ever since. But going home is another hard thing to do, riding on the bus, we were soaking wet, Me, Dawn, Vincent, Noriel and Angelique. And we stayed at the bus for almost 3 hours!!!! The question was, why is it that everytime that it rains, the traffic is just so slow-moving that you wanna get off the bus? Well, at least I got home safe.
Going home, I ate my lunch and watch Grey's Anatomy. I love Grey's Anatomy, it just reminds me over and over again that I want to be a doctor, and right now, I am thinking if I want to be a surgeon. Mom says that being a surgeon is a risky job, that people's lives are in my hands and I have to really study hard. I know that being a surgeon is the most competitive and life-risking job in the world of medicine, but I think it is quite fun, not fun that I will knife down a person's body but fun that I will be able to save lives. At least thinking about the good karmas i will gain. But I will spend about 8 years at medical school to fulfill these soaring high dreams. Does studying this course requires a thorough specialty in Physics? Gawd! If ever, I will really have the "hardest" time in my life. haha.
Anyways, time changes and no one knows what will happen next. But I will stick on being a doctor.
I have already save 670 pesos because I am planning to buy this cute Bible that I saw at Robinson's Ermita. I think it cost 700. So with my own money I will buy the greatest gift that I can give to myself- the Bible. It has a cute Precious Moments graphic at that Bible and I really want to buy that. Another 150 pesos and I will be ready to buy. It's a quite surprising thing for that I am now able to save money for my personal pleasure and satisfaction, buying candy magazine was a monthly theraphy for me and I spend my own money on buying on it. Sometimes mom's do buy it..haha. If ever I want to have a gift for my friend, I buy them with my own money. But this time, I will save money for the gift I am going to give for my parents. My mom will have her birthday at September 21 and I want to buy her a bag, while dad, celebrating his birthday on September 22, I will buy him..uhm...All about related to beatles? Because dad is so choosy when it comes to gift, sometimes he didn't use it..haha! and one more thing, I think I will give them cards on their anniversary on September 22. Haha.. This requires lots of saving. I think, someones not gonna eat..haha! At least it contributes on my diet...haha.
Well, so much for today, still I am not studying for the lovely Physics for the summative tomorrow and MAPEH-CAT too! Ooh...I hate it...too much temptation, TV, Computer!!!! They're everywhere.!!! Ciao!

The Tranquility There is When it Rains!

"Happiness cannot come from without. It must come from within.
It is not what we see and touch or that chich others do for us
which makes us happy; it is that which
we think and feel and do,
first for the other fellow and then for
ourselves.------Helen Keller
Rain has been pouring down non-stop today. Due to low pressure area. It's raining season again. And I must not forget to bring umbrella to school always. Everytime, when it rain, especially at home, I became so quiet. I just to be quiet and think about things. Why do we associate thinking when it rained? I just feel good when it rains. Thinking about how complex life can be. Thinking bout my future. Thinking 'bout my friends. Thinking 'bout my perio exam. Thinking about passing Up. Thinking about being a Cinderella. Thinking about everything. Why do I have to think about everything. Then I fall asleep. Sleeping nowadays, is the last thing that I will think. Projects, Portfolios, Perio exams. No more sleeping days. But today, I slept because it rained. Rain=relaxation. Rain=peace. Rain=tranquility. Rain=silence. Rain=blessing. Rain=Crying. Rain=Thinking. Rain=Music. As you grow older, you are becoming more and more complicated. I wish I am just like Pooh bear. I want to sing the "Cottleston Pie". Pooh is so simple, simple-minded, although at other person he may look stupid and idiot---Pooh is innocent. But being an innocent in this world? Nah...You won't survive living this world. You must be strategic, impulsive, ambitious, sometimes vain, independent. Because this world is not getting good, it's getting worse. If only I could live my life in the forest. If only I have the power to turn back time. If only....Life is full of regrets. My life is sometimes full of regrets. I didn't learn from past mistake and that was I regretted the most. Regretting your regrets. Doing the same thing all over again. I'm just tired. Right now, I am trying to live a God-fearing, peaceful, tranquil life. Just life that is full of smiles, life that is full of music, food, wonderful dreams, love, hope, faith, strawberry swirls, laces, all of my favorite stuffs. I just want to live life good.

Last Tuesday, my teacher in English shows us poem titled "Crossroads". It is true, that 4th year students are now standing on the crossroads, choosing the best path. What would I choose? and what if there's no choice? But there's always a choice. If I choose, would I be sure of it? Would I be satisfied? Would I live my dreams and goal through my journey? Would I meet interesting people? Would I meet death? Questions. Questions. Future is so erratic. You didn't know what might happen. *Sighs*. Life is really mysterious and yet so beautiful.

Before I die, I would like to fulfill these dreams:
---A perfect score in Physics!---
---To witness Aurora Borealis---
---To play at an orchestra---
---To have my own piano concerto---
---To become the best doctor---

The BIG day!

"We cannot have a perfectly mutual and reciprocal love
because the same amount of love we give can only be found in God."
It's a good thing that I am able to post before the BIG day tomorrow. MALCOLM HALL: COLLEGE OF LAW 12:30 pm, bring your snacks and a no.2 mongol pencil because tomorrow will be my test in UP!!!! This is the day...the day that we've prepared for, all those reviews and weeks of sleepless nights, all those all-about readings when there is a vacant in class, in short all those arduous task that I've done before this day. At Last this day comes. It's a once in a life chance. Sabi nga I must collect good karmas...haha... But even though, my test would be at noon, we would still go there at around 8:00 leaving the house because I don't want to be late. I won't miss this opportunity that being late is not excuse.

The recommendation form that I gave to Mam Lava last week for Ateneo was lost...haha...Looks like He really doesn't want me to take the test. I think sooner the forms of La Salle will be lost...haha...The reason I want to try those entrance exams is that I just want to experience entering those "sosy" schools. But IF EVER I passed those two schools, there's no way that I will enter those schools. First it's a sectarian school, and I am an INC, second because of too much expenses. I am not used to a school who has high tuition fees because during high schools, MAsci don't have any kind of tuition fees. So UP is my only hope to go to college. But I don't rely on my knowledge and strength only, in fact I will not have these if God didn't help me, so I make sure that before I do things on my own, I will consult everything to God. I am not uber confident about everything, I just want to be humble, in fact, I am so nervous right now. I just want to cry. I don't know I want to cry. You know? the feeling that what if I don't pass the test...but no...faith is the first thing that God looks at our hearts. So I have the faithest faith of all ....I will pass UP!!!!!!!!!! Uuuu....adrenaline rush...

It's Very Alarming

Now, i will have a post about the most alarming thing that nature can give us. Mother nature is in it's fury and intense anger. No rain, shortage on electric power, the alarming global warming that has been on the critical state, heat waves that has killed many people, volcaninc erruptions and many other things that we can't even control. People are thinking on how we will solve these problems. Remedies have been made like the "cloud seeding" or artificial rain because dams lack water. I asked dad why did there is a shortage on electric power, so he explained to me that the water falling from the dam is the potential energy needed to make the turbine rotate or to produce hydroelectric power but there is not enough water to make the turbine run because there is no rain. Why there is no rain...it is because of the getting worse global warming which is due to human exploitation of human resources. The increase emission of Carbon Dioxide which is very harmful to our environment, the ozone layer is depleting. No it's not depleting, I think it is already depleted. Whether its raining or not, it's still so hot and the heat is not normal. I once read at a newspaper that in Hungary 500 people died because of heatwave. In Baguio, it is reported in the news that ice was rained and it was not normal. What's happening to our environment, truly, mother nature gives us what deserves us and maybe it is the sign that the world will end....soon.

What can we do? If you will look at people, they don't care. "Some" of them don't care. They just think that it is normal that we experience this kind of things. but it is not. We must be informed that it is quite really alarming that theses things happen. We might never know, maybe tomorrow, fires will pour down from the skies, people will die from heat wave, we will lack water and will be searching everywhere for it and disease will surely spread. Aren't you afraid? I am afraid. It's getting worse and worst....