While I'm typing on the keyboard and jotting down my thoughts on this blog, I am actually very sleepy right now. My body has been working and adjusting by now for this semester. Excited? I hope so, and I think I must be excited and be motivated more or less, inspired. I will having 6 major subjects this semester and that is not a joke. I will be having Compa Ana, Physics and Organic Chem with their respective Lab and Lecture Classes to boot them all, and to make things worse 3 consecutive majors were being taken every Tuesdays and Thursdays. So this is the start of a hellish life, once and for all.
This time, I promised myself that I will not commit once more the same mistake and the same procrastination I had last sem. Experiencing the anxiety and the feeling of "doubt" leaves me physically, mentally and most of all emotionally restless. I even experienced nightmares believe it or not. So as much as possible, I'm making most of my time to be very useful and I might say "productive" so as to avoid cramming and piling up of works, which I totally abhor. Time management is the key, I know but it seems that no matter how hard I try it seems not working.
So, a quick recap first on whats-happened-to-me this week. Happy to see friends and classmates again, excited to meet new professors but not yet ready to welcome stress. First week is quite boring because of the same "reading the syllabus" routine. We even got to watch 2012 during our 4-hrs break, will be writing a review on my multiply if I can write on it. hahaha. So where are we? Oh yes, I've got a good news: Our prof in Organic Chem is Doc Sam! Yehey! hahaha. I really don't know, but it seems that lately, there's something magical in Doc Sam that I was even rejoicing the moment he entered the room and I am not sarcastically saying this one. Though at first there's a part on me that half wants doc sam and the other half doesn't want him still I have learned a lot from him and he unconsciously brought back the things that I forgot to do as a college student--- that learning is spontaneous. We also met Doc Figueroa in our Org Chem Lab, Mam Ramirez on Compa Ana Lab, Mam Tabo on Compa Ana Lec and Sir Al Rey on Physics Lab and Lec and I can say that they were all great professors and I hope that my first impression on them last till the end of semester.
Base on my statistical point of view, I will be having a hard time surviving this semester. First of all, though many people don't really know, I have many obligations to fulfill once I got home. I'm not that typical teenager/adult that once got home, eat, study and hit the sack (though sometimes, I do wish that). I have to baby sit my little sister and to tell you frankly, mamamayat kayo sa kanya. I love my sister, I adore her because she is such a cute little angel that was surprisingly given to my family, that's my responsibility as an ate and I have to accept it wholeheartedly. Another thing is, I have an obligation to fulfill on our church. As a pianist on the choir and attending prayers and worship services, I must do my best in order to fulfill the task that I was assigned to do. Now, to set things straight I am not complaining about all these blabberings, in fact I was very thankful that God has given me responsibilities to hone me as a good person. What I'm trying to say is, I wish there are more than 24 hours in a day and I wish that I could devise a way to surmount the speed of light so I can control time, which is obviously impossible. I'm really a retard. I need lots of prayer and hard work to survive each passing day.
Ha! I need to say goodbye for now and God bless all. :)
Friday, November 20, 2009
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
Too Thankful!
With my recent fretting about my grade in Chem, finally I have come across Doc Sam and I was really surprised the moment I saw my grade. Angels from heavens sing: "Hallelujah". Finally, finally, finally I can sleep well and breath well. There's like a big chunk of bone stuck on your throat that has been removed! What a great feeling. I bring back all of these to Him. Thank you po! I promise that I'll never have that feeling of anxiety ever again next sem. I really hate that kind of feeling.
I have been trying to make myself busy these days but it seems that all that I'm planning to do won't work out because I always ended up sleeping. I sleep like there's no tomorrow. Well anyway, I'm barely not sleeping during school days, its as if sleeping is a luxury that cannot be bought, my body is only asking some sleep. hahaha.
I have been back with editing and blogging! I have been using Adobe Photoshop CS 4 and I'm still have lots of learning and studying to do. If only my laptop could have a bigger space... can someone buy me an external memory drive 500 GB or 1 TB?! hahaha. Or, or I could buy Macbook 1 TB and enjoy my life. Ooooo! I have been really itching to buy one, but I have to wait until med school.
Honestly right now, I have lots of things that I want but it seems that it could only be possible just by imagining it. "If only I could buy this, or buy that..." "If only I have the infinite money...", too many ifs, that's why I'm really trying hard to study so those "ifs" will turn to reality.
Well, I have to be thankful on what I have right now and have to live a better life.
:)
I have been trying to make myself busy these days but it seems that all that I'm planning to do won't work out because I always ended up sleeping. I sleep like there's no tomorrow. Well anyway, I'm barely not sleeping during school days, its as if sleeping is a luxury that cannot be bought, my body is only asking some sleep. hahaha.
I have been back with editing and blogging! I have been using Adobe Photoshop CS 4 and I'm still have lots of learning and studying to do. If only my laptop could have a bigger space... can someone buy me an external memory drive 500 GB or 1 TB?! hahaha. Or, or I could buy Macbook 1 TB and enjoy my life. Ooooo! I have been really itching to buy one, but I have to wait until med school.
Honestly right now, I have lots of things that I want but it seems that it could only be possible just by imagining it. "If only I could buy this, or buy that..." "If only I have the infinite money...", too many ifs, that's why I'm really trying hard to study so those "ifs" will turn to reality.
Well, I have to be thankful on what I have right now and have to live a better life.
:)
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The World As We Know It
Oh, I'm thinking the first line on how to start this one, but looks like I've got one!
........
.........
.....
You know what?
......
What?
............
I'm like a retard, a minuscule tweet on this humongous, filthy piece of land. I know, many people know that.
.....
Have you ever felt that wanting to rob Bill Gates' mansion or even fake his account? So you could own lots and lots of money? Shame for me, I didn't get his wits. :)
I'm hopeless. I feel hopeless. I'm emo. I'll slight my wrist, draw some weird eyeliner under my eyes and all the emo-things.
They say that its just a strand of hair between sanity and insanity and I've crossed that line!
Do I look like Audrey Hepburn? Or maybe Megan Fox? Or maybe Heidi Klum? Adriana Lima?
Stop all this sh*ty talks.
Sometimes, doing your best is not enough. I want to be Albert Einstein, i want to have his beliefs, his intelligence but it seems that there's something that hinders me from achieving it like some "ethical distress" thingy.
Gosh! I'm emo again. Can't I talk some "happy" things. Um, i've got lots of suitors!!! hahaha. That's crap actually. That's a happy talk for me. hahaha.
I have been a bum... a real certified bum. I'm like sleeping 4 hours and wake up to eat then sleep again. My headaches.
Do I sound like a retard? If I do sound, then stop reading this nonsense, if otherwise. If you could understand this "things" retarded, insane people do, then thank you.
:)
........
.........
.....
You know what?
......
What?
............
I'm like a retard, a minuscule tweet on this humongous, filthy piece of land. I know, many people know that.
.....
Have you ever felt that wanting to rob Bill Gates' mansion or even fake his account? So you could own lots and lots of money? Shame for me, I didn't get his wits. :)
I'm hopeless. I feel hopeless. I'm emo. I'll slight my wrist, draw some weird eyeliner under my eyes and all the emo-things.
They say that its just a strand of hair between sanity and insanity and I've crossed that line!
Do I look like Audrey Hepburn? Or maybe Megan Fox? Or maybe Heidi Klum? Adriana Lima?
Stop all this sh*ty talks.
Sometimes, doing your best is not enough. I want to be Albert Einstein, i want to have his beliefs, his intelligence but it seems that there's something that hinders me from achieving it like some "ethical distress" thingy.
Gosh! I'm emo again. Can't I talk some "happy" things. Um, i've got lots of suitors!!! hahaha. That's crap actually. That's a happy talk for me. hahaha.
I have been a bum... a real certified bum. I'm like sleeping 4 hours and wake up to eat then sleep again. My headaches.
Do I sound like a retard? If I do sound, then stop reading this nonsense, if otherwise. If you could understand this "things" retarded, insane people do, then thank you.
:)
Thursday, October 22, 2009
I'm Back!
Whew! Almost 2 months of no blogging, must have been really engrossing myself from too much academics, which I literally have done. I was like a robot that was programmed to do this and that and to tell you honestly that was really tiring, so tiring. This sem has really left an overtly overwhelming part in me, I have experienced all different kinds emotions-- from excited to being depressed (emo! hahaha with Keisha), to being excessively happy, nervous, anxious, eager, LAZY and all that stuff and semester break is just a breath of fresh air and ah! how could I forget Doc Sam, he's the major highlight of this semester, hahaha! I never thought that chemistry would be soo exciting, fun and stressful with him, of course with Doc Sam's help. :))
Now that is not sarcastic as you may see it, I'm serious about it. Doc Sam is an angel in disguise, though many students CAN'T and some many NOT be able to see this one. He wants his students to learn, to stand up on their own and to THINK, to think really hard that all the juices on brain will be sucked out. hahaha. Nevertheless, I just want to thank Doc Sam for all the learnings, though I'm quite not satisfied with my grades on Chem! But anyway, I have a great feeling that he will still be our prof in Org Chem and I really don't know if I'll be elated? hahaha.
Enough of my blabbering about Doc Sam.
Next sem would be a tough one for us, indeed. Below is my schedule and we've reached the maximum units!
Though I am so looking forward on this one, I still have an angst in terms of my academic status. I still really don't know if I am capable to excelling on this one. I hope, I hope with God's help that I would still be able to excel. Hoo! Anyways, if ever I would not be able to pursue med, I'll be jumping off the clip and be like Bella, waiting for Edward or Jacob or some hot stuff out there to save me and I'll marry him, blah blah blah. hahaha. Now, that would be nice. =)
No! I won't let myself befallen once again into procrastination and excessive laziness. I have done with I have been through with the past and the consequences at stake are too much, I won't let that happen again. God has given me ONE more chance not to commit the "same mistake" I have done before and I humbly and deeply thank Him for that, He's really good.
Ah! I'll promise to make this semester break productive.
1. Read as much as I want! Books! Books! Books! I can't live without them!
2. Driving Lessons! Finally.
3. Clean my room. My room is like a forest where all different forms of life are already accumulating.
4. Sleep! Is there anything more divine?
5. Food, ahh!
6. Movies, I really feel so movie deprived.
7. Be more active in church. =))
8. PIANO!!!! I haven't really been able to touch the keys since who-knows-when and I'm going back to my old pieces.
9. And anything that I could think of...
Thank you and it's nice to be back. :)
Now that is not sarcastic as you may see it, I'm serious about it. Doc Sam is an angel in disguise, though many students CAN'T and some many NOT be able to see this one. He wants his students to learn, to stand up on their own and to THINK, to think really hard that all the juices on brain will be sucked out. hahaha. Nevertheless, I just want to thank Doc Sam for all the learnings, though I'm quite not satisfied with my grades on Chem! But anyway, I have a great feeling that he will still be our prof in Org Chem and I really don't know if I'll be elated? hahaha.
Enough of my blabbering about Doc Sam.
Next sem would be a tough one for us, indeed. Below is my schedule and we've reached the maximum units!
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Though I am so looking forward on this one, I still have an angst in terms of my academic status. I still really don't know if I am capable to excelling on this one. I hope, I hope with God's help that I would still be able to excel. Hoo! Anyways, if ever I would not be able to pursue med, I'll be jumping off the clip and be like Bella, waiting for Edward or Jacob or some hot stuff out there to save me and I'll marry him, blah blah blah. hahaha. Now, that would be nice. =)
No! I won't let myself befallen once again into procrastination and excessive laziness. I have done with I have been through with the past and the consequences at stake are too much, I won't let that happen again. God has given me ONE more chance not to commit the "same mistake" I have done before and I humbly and deeply thank Him for that, He's really good.
Ah! I'll promise to make this semester break productive.
1. Read as much as I want! Books! Books! Books! I can't live without them!
2. Driving Lessons! Finally.
3. Clean my room. My room is like a forest where all different forms of life are already accumulating.
4. Sleep! Is there anything more divine?
5. Food, ahh!
6. Movies, I really feel so movie deprived.
7. Be more active in church. =))
8. PIANO!!!! I haven't really been able to touch the keys since who-knows-when and I'm going back to my old pieces.
9. And anything that I could think of...
Thank you and it's nice to be back. :)
Monday, August 03, 2009
Just a Moment
I need to take a break. I am becoming too cynical and pessimistic about things lately. I am lately becoming bitter and afflictive more like of a "What the f*ck do you care?!", something like that and it sounds bad. hahaha. I have been burying myself lately to Ecology and Chem books. I have been working pre-labs and postlabs non-stop and even though I don't have any works to do, I still think of doing something because there's something in me that tells that I should do something and to tell you quite frankly, that's really wierd. I am very much concern with my grades right now because I can't afford to fail at any subject. But looking at what's happening right now, the more I "try" the harder it gets for me to be my best and that really sucks.
I am miss reading books, having a good movie to watch or just spending time with myself. I miss RELAXING. It seems that I need to buy that word "relaxing". I have at least to balance my daily consumption of those freaking so-called "knowledge". Being too scientific gives leaves you to be a total stranger to this world, so I need to have some good literary things to refresh my significance in this world. Haaah! I need to pamper myself with a good book, but how on Pete's sake can I do that? When in fact, I don't have the time to finish reading my major subjects' books. Now that freakin' frustrating.
Well, at least here's blogging, a convenient way to channel my ramblings and mumblings. School is so tiring.
I am miss reading books, having a good movie to watch or just spending time with myself. I miss RELAXING. It seems that I need to buy that word "relaxing". I have at least to balance my daily consumption of those freaking so-called "knowledge". Being too scientific gives leaves you to be a total stranger to this world, so I need to have some good literary things to refresh my significance in this world. Haaah! I need to pamper myself with a good book, but how on Pete's sake can I do that? When in fact, I don't have the time to finish reading my major subjects' books. Now that freakin' frustrating.
Well, at least here's blogging, a convenient way to channel my ramblings and mumblings. School is so tiring.
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